Thursday, November 02, 2006

Am in Pune...

Well am in pune and sittin in a net cafe... samajh nahin aa raha hai kya likhon aur kya nahin... to bas yahi hai jo likh raha hoon.....

Somethings new, somethings are old,
Am not near my home made of gold,
Trying to get the taste of new things'
Lookin to acclimatise to the surroundings,
Few and far between I see the things,
And in my heart a sad bell rings,
Trying to figure out the sound of the bell,
And the homemade dishes I do smell,
Just then the dream is lost and broken,
My tear are inside hidden,
What am sayin and what i wanted to say,
All that come to my lips is Nay,
Am tryin to console myself sayin am Happy,
But now nothings here neither home nor my Lappy ;)

chalo then aal of you ppl
Take care
and Miss me
Hope to c a all soon
Bbye

Manish

Sunday, October 15, 2006

Teardrop...


A lone tear trickled down my face,
Unknown to it, what's its fate,
Only a few knew why it was there,
Few knew its genesis n its birth,
The heart was bleeding n so did the soul,
The world was lost n the home,
Treasure of lifetime was plundered,
Relatioships broken n heart scattered,
Left was now a loner n a loser,
One who couldn't take care of his treasure,
Giving birth to that lone drop called Tear,
And same for me, like it I don't know,
Just left to live life, on the fate,
Like the lone tear, trickling down my face.

Wednesday, October 11, 2006

Silence within me...

Silent thoughts in my mind,Rumbling around the place,
I search for peace in them,Alas! I am completely lost.
The silence over a period,Starts to pinch me hard,
Is the silence in truth?
Or a general placid facade.
Like a calm sea waiting for me,To allay my fears,
When I step in the clear waters,There lies a storm hidden.
I am all caught up,Don't know where to go,
Its just the feeling I share,Searching for someone,
Whom I don't even know.
The silence now becomes,A lifetime companion.
But still I fail to gather,Its subtle meaning.
I let my mind run through wild,To explore new horizons,
To the setting sun behind,And in the end all I find,
I am lost within my mind.The labours are in vain,
Oh! help me. Help me please.
I am in great pain.
Let me understand what you mean,I tell silence at last.
All I get is an enigmatic smile,A smile that gave me the food,
The food, which my mind craved.It just said don't be afraid,
I am just what you are?
I am the one, the soul,the beauty, the ultimate goal,
I am all and All is me.
I keep all things,Deep inside me.
You are my part,And I am yours,
So just accept me,And you'll discover peace.
A thing that you want to get,A thing to fulfil your needs,
I am the Silence,I am the Peace.
I am what you desire.So why do you run thee.
Embrace me oh! human,Discover my capablities,
I'll make you at ease,To you I'll bring,
The much needed peace,
I am the silence,
I am the peace.

Sunday, October 01, 2006

Something to tell ya...

Hey fellas.... got to tell ya something.. from now on this blog of mine will be for poems while I have another one in which I will b posting my general write-ups, so plz bookmark this new link also http://orderinrandomnez.blogspot.com/ .Am sorry for all the inconvenience caused to you ppl, but am sure that you will bear with me. Rest am again back to my normal antics ;)
Well have a great time all of you.
Tc
GBU all
Manish

"Life's too short to be sad, so why not be happy"

Monday, September 25, 2006

Safar-e-zindagi...

Ek aap jaise kuch kadradanon ki wajah se he to hum hai...
warna apni hasti bhi mitti mein gum hai....
jahan se aaye the, wahin to ek din jaana hai.....
phir is sach se kyon sharmana hai..
na hasti rahegi ek din na naam...
bas kuch nagme, aur thodi jaam...
koi nahin jaanta apna anjaam....
arey ye dunya karti hai har ek ko badnam....
main to yaha ka musafir hoon....
nahin mera koi thikana hai....
aaj ko jeta hoon,kal kisne jana hai...
jo aaya tha usko to ek din usi mitti mein mil jana hai...
kuch meri chahat hai,aur baaki beimaan zamana hai
bas is hasti ko jab tak bachana hai....
jab tak khak se nahin hua dostana hai....
uske baad to wahi mera ghar hai,wahi gharana hai....
mitti se aaya tha... mitti mein he mil jana hai....
mitti mein mil jana hai, mitti mein mil jana hai....

Saturday, September 23, 2006

Am back...

Hi to all,
I am back and will once again be actively posting write-ups on this blog... sorry for the inconvenience caused to you all... hope that all are fine...
Take Care
N thnx for Missin me ;)
Besties to all
God bless you all
Manish

Thursday, August 24, 2006

Random Thoughts...

"Wanting to write something,which is hidden,
I write that something, not meant to be written."

Well, for a past few days, I am feeling restless.Nothing to do, nowhere to go and thoroughly confused about what to do.So that is a brief overview of my mind's state.Last few days have really been a hard time for me. Its that time when you know that you have to do many things but still you are doing nothing, because you don't feel like doing anything and why you feel like not doing anything is still a mystery. You then think its better to let the things as they are and not to worry about them. But the more you try to avoid these things the more you are into it. You don't want to unfurl that mystery but still you are curious, thats human nature. Your mind is always in a conflict and running through contradictions, well thats my mind am talking about. I have lots to think about and lots to do. But I am taking this time as to relax and more than relaxing, I am getting impatient. I know that I have to prepare for my job, to do some work entrusted upon me by my parents ( well I had voluntarily asked them, that I would do that work ), to clean my room ( hahaha... I usually do that when I have got no place to sit ;) ) and the most important of all study for CAT. But as the gods are in my favour, I have become lazy to that extent that now even eating food has become a trying job for me. God knows what I am trying to do and where am I trying to lead myself and my life. Today the things were so unbearable for me that I just wanted to went out my anger or frustrations as many would say somewhere so I thought that this would be the place.
People usually change from good to better but yours truly is changing from bad to worse. Its that state of life that I detest the most. Why?? Because here I am having no pressure to do anything. My parents are satisfied about their ward, my friends are not in the town ( only a few are, but they are also busy ), my company is not calling me before Oct and whenever I sit for studtying I feel hungry or have a headache ;) . I am not enjoying the things that I used to enjoy , that is reading and music. Am fed up with computers and net. And above all, when I tell people what my life is going through, I am advised very sincerely that I should take a break and go for a holiday. So, now am totally confused what to do and what not to do. Therefore, I decided today that I would pour out my mind in this space. And frankly, speaking am feeling a lillte better, who knows by tomorrow I would be alright or might go more deep into the misery. Still, I hope for the best and am planning to do some better things now. And try to reorganise my life.
So, I just say God Bless Me :D and also God Bless you All ( as I know you all would be thinking I have gone mad and by making you all read these thoughts making you mad )
hahaahaha....

Have a great time fellas,
C ya soon,

Manish :)

Wednesday, August 23, 2006

Jeewan aur Main...


Sukon na dil ko mila, na mann to chain aaya,
Aaj jab akele baith kar socha, ki jeewan mein kya paaya,
Kya is anndhi duniya ne,nacheez ko anndha banaya,
Ya is manzar ke nashe mein, khud ko he luta aaya,
Teemir ke samrajya mein, zameer bech khaaya,
Aaj ji kar bhi zinda nahin hoon, kyon aisa samaa hai,
Jeewan ke is soone safar mein, zindagi ko na gaale lagaya,
Maya ke bhanwar mein, apna vivek gavaya,
Aaj jeewan ki antim shaam mein,saath nahin hai apna saaya,
Woh bhi prakash ka saathi hai, aandhkar usse na bhaaya,
Kuch sochta hoon main, kuch jaannana hai mujhko,
Main kaun hoon? Main kahan se aaya?
Sirf khoya he to hai maine, kabhi na kuch paaya,
Aaj jab aanth aaya, to jeewan ka saar samajh paaya,
Yahan kaun hai apna. Yahan kaun hai apna...
Yahan har koi hai paraaya......

Friday, August 18, 2006

Rains.. Rains.. and More Rains.....

"Rain, rain, go away
Come again some other day
We want to go outside and play
Come again some other day"

These lines are from the nursery rhyme that we all used to sing when we were kids. At that age rains used to fascinate us.It was an enchantress that used to keep us kids spellbounded.The fun and the frolic, the singing and dancing all was just great at times but over the years of growing up the spell seems to be falling apart.The childhood memories were of greenry and happiness aal around, we never knew that rains could be that devastating or leave apart rains our so pure heart could never take anything to be devastating and bad. The years since have passed by and over these years we have encountered a variety of seasons, but if you look in fact its the rainy season that always capture the imagination of the mortals.Its the rains that make the poet write, it forms a perfect backdrop for lovers, a mood setter for singers and composers, an exciting match for players and what not. It has all the things that are need to capture ones imagination and it does that with ease.
The romance with rain drops is impossible to be described in words its just eternal. But the romance seems to be passing over these recent years. With the changing weather cycle, due to various reasons, the rain god has started playing havoc.With the parts of counrty receiving unprecedented rainfall, people have started fearing rains.The desert has been flooded with water.The plains inundated, while the rainshadow areas submerged.And add to the woes of people, this havoc is not stopping.
All this has struck to me due to the fact that, that my own city has witnessed such fury of the rain god.Infact all it happened was just a short spell and a heavy downpour, taking with all the things and the belongings of the people, while they watched helplessly. It was a sad scene, when we watch our creations ( I say our creations as it was the result of our efforts) washing away, the memories of our past being gobbled by the flowing waters, who have got no sense of direction or path, it just knows how to flow and that too with fury. The elixir has turned into poison.
I just say, Oh! lord. Show us mercy.

P.s. I just wished that something could be done about this. We all should try to find some solution to avoid these flood. And all the departed souls R.I.P.

Monday, August 14, 2006

Happy Independence Day!!!

Wishing All Indians Happy Independence Day!!!

Lets pledge and keep our tricolour flying proud and high.

Here I bring you some of our tricolour's shades I liked...


Saturday, August 05, 2006

Happy Friendship Day!!!


The fresh air was caressing my face,
Making my heart beat at a faster pace,
It marked a beginning of a new phase,
Where we all run the life's race.

As I put my feet on the ground,
The world started spinning around,
I felt it all shaky beneath,
And I stood there holding my breath.

The first step into the room,
Flooded with faces of new bloom,
I realised I was one of them,
Searching for a helping hand.

I spotted u sitting quitely,
Looking towards me intently,
The eyes which said it all,
Though they were round and small.

I took my place right beside you,
You made me feel secure and true,
That marked the beginning of a journey,
Called as friendship by many.

We sat through thick n thin,
Sometimes crying, sometimes grinnin,
The jokes and fights apart,
We always rode in the friendship's cart.

Whenever my life opened a new chapter,
where the things and the surroundings alter,
And a feeling of being lost came in,
I saw u towards me looking.

Smile on your face was like an angel,
Friend you are a gift so beautiful,
Few are gifted to have a true friend,
I will retain this relationship till the end.

Even when my life takes me far,
Between us there would be no bar,
And I know even then, when I need you,
I'll find you helping me thru.

I take this day to say just a thing,
Our friendship is unending,
Even if we are far apart,
We know, we live in each others Heart.

Dear friend I always pray for you,
You achieve what you want to,
And as I wish you, I say,
Happy Friendships Day!!!

PS. This lil' poem is dedicated to all my friends near or far.... Thanx for being my friend... :)

Tuesday, July 18, 2006

Blocking of Blogger domains...

Its really disheartning to see that the Indian Govt has brought down its axe on the blogs. Just bcoz few of those were not giving out the correct content or the content which the government thought was not in the interest of the country. The govt. may b right about the content but does it mean curbing the right to speech of a commoner. Its basically autocratic means of functioning, where the ruler decides whats right n whats wrong and in this way, the system functions.
For the govt. the list they gave to the ISPs it could have been more specific but no, without any reason, the whole domains were blocked. This basicaly means that somewhere deep down there is a serious fault in the functioning of the system. For a selected few the whole lot is being punished, thats unfair.Basically after the Mumbai serial blasts the govt. has got into action but the way the things are going on its sad. For some reason they are curbing the freedom to speech and dont knw what they hold for us in the future. But the basic fact remains that the intelligence has failed and now no use crying over spilt milk, try to address the basic cause of the problem, the leaks and not the commoner.
I think that the govt. will realize that, by curbing the freedom of speech they are doing nothing much but only hurting the sentiments of ppl more n more. Lets hope for a better tomorrow.God bless all the souls.

Wednesday, July 05, 2006

No title for this one.... Readers' are welcome to suggest one :)



Counting the seconds I was there,
Making it into hours of time,
Stretching those into days,
Finally ending into decades.
Life was stretching into years,
but I was still rooted to a place,
Things were moving n gaining,
But I was still searching for a name.
Somethings made sense during the trip,
While I was tripping over the rest,
Mutable thoughts never ending,
WOrries n troubles round the clock.
Mooching in the feelings forest,
Wanting to know the real thing,
Nearer as I came to it,
Farther it wades into space.
Seeing things come n go,
I age through the process,
Wisdom is hard to attract,
Failing in which I cannot.
Greying the body is there,
But the grey matter is not grey,
I realise viewing in different light,
Hard questions' answers I find.

Monday, July 03, 2006

Happiness...

I took the pen to scribble,
The few memories I had,
Little of them here,
And little of them there.

Beautiful in a way I say,
The time spent with my friends,
Feelin of those days,
I just lay happy awake.

Sweet things were they,
Heavenly in their own way,
Oh.. oh.. what a life it is,
Few things here and a few there.

I write here abound,
Feelings flowin profound,
singing in its own way,
My hearts merry and gay.

I lie with open eyes,
Flowing in the memories clouds,
A lil' dark and a lil' light,
Oh my what a beautiful sight.

Happiness is there to stay,
Beautiful and merrier than ever,
THe way things come and go,
My days are more livelier...

Am happy am happy am happy
more than i cud say....
making more of the time I have
and more of my earths stay....
am happy am happy am happy....
what a day i say......
am happy am happy am happy....

Tuesday, June 13, 2006

I want to write...


I want to write,
but am not able to do so.
To share my thoughts,
But there are none.
A good one was coming,
but has lost its way.
I still fail to say,
what I wanted to say.
A ripple is caused,
I search for the cause,
And in doing so,
I failed to notice the effect.
Everytime is life the stage,
or its the character.
I fail to understand,
part and plays of life.
So how can something,
do I write.
Again I hold the blank page,
With just ink drops.
As I cant write,
I can't write, write a word.

Sunday, June 04, 2006

Walking...

Walking towards the horizon,
i see the rising sun,
the line seems to move farther,
or was it never nearer.

I always want the possible,
Or is that thing always false,
towards the impossible i walk,
and shatter my woven thoughts.

Some say i think a lot,
for other I am a brat,
I myself think that,
I want what i have lost.

Never in the past u can go,
Nor the future comes true,
I wade thru the present,
Which i think was never meant to.

The sun is coming nearer,
I am happy for a while,
It all seems so real,
Or is this superficial.

Shadows grow n shrink,
I come to life's brink,
Feelings come n go within,
But am entity with no mind.

They why, why theres a burnin,
Burnin deep inside this entity,
One who just listens to world,
But knws its better not to react much.

The horizon again seems far,
Sun is setting on horizon,
Was it all mirage to me,
I was never nearer to it.

Somethings missing somewhere,
Tears are not coming,
But somewhere they are abound,
Again I say to myself no probs.

Its all bout what I think,
What am I doing,
But deep within I knw,
Its the real happiness that matters.

I stop running after the mirage,
Gave my life a pause,
Asked the all powerful for direction,
And Then I found My WAY!!!

Sunday, May 28, 2006

Time goes on...

I looked back on time, when thy said it was mine.
I took all the sacks, so that into them " time" I could pack.
I tried n tried, but all in vain. The end result was still the same.
I just let more of it slip away then the amount I could catch.
And then it dawned upon me, I was catching that could not be caught.
The time bygone was never mine, the time to come is not mine,
its the present time that is mine and am wasting it all the time.
I again looked back and the time was smiling and then I realized,
it was something that I could never catch but yes I can live upto full,
the time I have with me, the time I can live within.

I came to write something today and thought writin bout the current affairs, but the above lines flowed even before on the screen I did stare. This was something totally unexpected as nothing was in my concious mind but yup, nobody can vouch for the subconcious.
Today, I had my 3rd paper and now only one is left. Yesterday night, when I laid on my bed and was letting my thoughts flow. I suddenly realised that I was thinking about my past few years : how they had been? how I had fared all these years and all. It was nothing specific to start with but later on something stirred my mind. Past few months for me had both happy and sad memories. But I chose to remember the happy ones :) . I made a lot of friends and god was really gracious to have bestowed to me some very good friends. My time spent with them though was small but it was really of high quality. All these things made me happy.
But now as I sat writing, somethings pinching me. Its all about to change, the times, the surroundings and all. As they say " Nothing is permanent except change" , I was just thinking is it necessary for everything, yes, everything to change. Then, it suddenly dawned upon me : Was I holding things too tight? Was I trying to hold time in my hand? Was I just like any other person, not wanting to accept the truth? Or am I sensitive or insensitive?
Don't know what to say, but this question of being sensitive and insensitive really bugged me. It really one important question to which's answer am desperately trying to find out. Does being practical means you are insensitive ? Or I may put it in a some better words - Does taking the reality into your stride means you are insensitive or you dont care for people? Am really at loss for this thing. I know that now the time is not far when I will have to forgo my home, when I will be joining my job. And when I would leave this city, I would also leave many things behind. But, it does not mean that I will leave my old relations behind. They were there,they are there, they will be there and will remain for eons. But, for some its an end to relations and all. You could not have each and everything you want, for gaining something, somethings have to be forgone. So, its upto you what do you want and what choice you make and then you continue on that path.
Its again the same old story with me, trying to tell something else and something other has come out. But, then this topic was also looming in mind mind for sometime back, so it came out here. Its a few days left for me to leave this place and start afresh, but then I want to live my life in present and while trying to do so, I don't try to hurt anyone, but still if I have done that in the process am sorry for it.
So, there goes my thoughts.... and lets see when something new crops up here.... till then...
bbye
take care

Yours
Manish

Tuesday, May 16, 2006

Exams are on...

It has been quite a few days that I have not visited this place... was sort of busy... ( well had to say that... ). Anyways, my exams are going on so was gettin lil time for bloggin. Actually, was not in the mood to write something new... but now its ok. Today, had my first paper and now its 3 more to go... then comes the part everybody is waiting for or not rather... the day when the exams are over and its party time and then the parting time....
Well well, let those things remain the way they are. Today was my first paper for final semester and now at the moment very happy. Well its like 1 down and 3 more to go at todays date. Chalo yaar no more of this crappy stuff of me 'n' my studies... there are much better things in life to think n write about ;) .
Life is full of different colors... its upto us what color we want to see. Its like whenever there is light we have a dark shadow... but that shadow has also got some qualities, its upto u what u see the darkness or the teachin that... when in the light of glory everybody is with you.... but in the darness of oblivion you are all alone... so try to find real gems... n dont b too busy collecting stones when you realise suddenly that you have lost a diamond. A true friend is worth a million dollors so dont lose that friend.
I dont knw what am i scribbling at this moment but still I had let it remain there. I dont knw how everyone faces life.. as to every other person his life is at the worst period while all the persons by his side are enjoying their life to max. Its not like that, each and everyone of us has got our own special problems but the tough ones dont always blame the circumstances and cry over the problem, they work on the problem ... solve it and come out victorious of the situation. Some say that its easy to preach but hard to follow... but sometimes the preachings come from our own experiences.... neways too much of this stuff..... now am goin to stop....
If u ppl out there think this whole post is absurd dont blame me as my exams are going on... so here on this page comes the after effects of my not studtyin for the exams... oops! did I write not studyin... neways now its written let it be.... Chalo then... i'll take ur leave...
BBye
Take care

And Wish me luck for Exams.....
Yours
Manish

Sunday, April 30, 2006

Oh those 4 years in college...

The cool wind gushes by,
I stand still in the open sky,
Up and high the clouds fly,
The memories come flooding to thy,
All the friends walking by,
Also the girls, to whom I was shy,
The green grass on which we used to lie,
Looking at the bluest of the blue sky,
To Canteen's patties, pasteries and pie,
The night parties we used to enjoy,
The drinks and smokes we used to try,
In fights setting standards high,
To gibing at lecturers n Profs passing by,
From freshers day to farewels suit and tie,
And many more things,that my thoughts belie,
The meaning for me of the 4 years gone by,
It was like a star studded night sky,
And now its the time to say goodbye,
To a life that made me laugh and cry,
Now I am a free bird in earnest to fly,
But to a destination not known to thy,
Alone, alone in the open sky,
With no 4 years to share my sorrows and joy.
Those 4 years have passed by...........

Tuesday, April 18, 2006

I dunno :)

Well writing a post after some time... but this also isn't something great... these were the few lines written by me... while having a talk with my friend.... I don't know if these make any sense... but then thought should put it here... so here are they... :)

I walk, walk through the life,
See the world, world in binds,
Live the life, life so confused,
I meet, meet and part in life,
Think about good, good & bad alike,
Take the pen, pen down the thoughts,
Close the eyes, eyes so beautiful,
Deep within, within feelings came & go,
I am awake, awake but not concious,
Well just learn, learn bout life,
Alone in chain, chain in the mind,
Free to fly, fly with full freedom,
Reach to thy, thy is the kingdom.

P.s. Well the title of the post just came to my mind... just as I dunno y...

Monday, April 10, 2006

Parting... that never was.... :)

A few days back, I had a gud fight with one of my best friends.... as usual, it started on some idiotic note and don't knw how it ballooned into a heated argument... which resulted into solid fight. Well, after the fight, we both were sulkin (haha... I knew bout myself n later bout my frnd ;) ). But the fight was such huge that we both were unwilling to talk to each other.... so now what to do... our ego's were turning out to be bigger than us....
Later on, after some time I realised that I am hurtin myself more by losing such a good frnd... and then I felt very bad... so I told myself... even if we are partin ways.. it shud be done in a very nice manner.... there shud be no hard feelings.... so just out of the blue... i jotted down somelines.... and sent it to my frnd....
Here are those lines :

"i learnt a lot from u, i taught a lot to u,
i fought a lot with u, I listened a lot to u,
i made fun of u, I made a fool of myself for u,
i scolded u a lot, u returned the favour on spot,
i made u angry at times, u made me angry at times,
i spoke a lot bout u, I never knew bout u,
i was a child, u were a child,
I was similar to u, u were similar to me,
I thought all was fine, u were on cloud nine,
I failed to understand u, u never told me what u thought,
I almost lost u, u justs thought the same,
I have now lost u, life will never b the same,
I cherish our talks n fights, the wrongs n rights,
the darknes n lights, the song n sights,
but all is gone, n none is here,
Life gave a beautiful friend,i lost the gift,
life taught me a lesson, never to cause a rift."

Well... the lines had their effect.... there was a reply on mail.... and after that we resumed talking... so its like "all well that ends well".... Neways, but I revised an ol' lesson... a broken friendship is more painful, than a hurt ego.... so never try to bring ego in between the frnds... just try to sort out the matter....

Njoy ur time on earth
Manish

P.S. - Had nothin new to write... so had written down.. this incident :D

Wednesday, March 29, 2006

Hmm...

I look towards the grey sky, the floating clouds there abound,
The gentle breeze moving them, they are just like - lost n found,
Sinking into the deep within, memories are floating by,
Somethings look lively enough, still a missing feeling is thereby,
Symphony turns into cacophony, brightness leads to darkness,
Like drenched in chilling rain, feet routed in the ground,
Unable to hear in the splashing sound, the lost me making sound,
What I take as victory peals, is the sobbing self within reveals,
Standing in the known crowd, still making the self alone,
It is all real or illusion, the sound melancholy or confusion,
The body is to be wasted, soul is to be released,
Still thinking as though taking all, all thats around me,
And ultimately when the time comes, I am the only one,
The uniting of the soul has come, with almighty I become one,
Its again the clouds sound, the feeling remains sound,
What hav I lost n what hav I found, alone in crowd is my destiny abound,
And waiting for God to say - Lost n found.

Thursday, March 23, 2006

Random thoughts...

Ha.... finally here after a long time... ( well for me it was a long time.. :D). Well, I still had not formed my mind so as to what will I be scribbling here so am just putting the casual thoughts that are coming to me. For, past few days, life was sort of just passing by.... and me was just whiling my time away.... anyways, today was feelin nice so thought to jot down something...
Actually, this is my third attempt to put down something as with the last two I was not satisfied. Words don't seem to be too willing to come out from within the soul... as this is the place one should listen to. Too much of heart makes the dish too sweet and too much of brain makes the dish too sour the best combination is from the soul as it has got a perfect balance between the too. It knows what preperation is to be served - a lil sweet a lil salty ;) Soul is the reason of your existance.... without it you cease to exist anymore... So, I always try to listen to the inner voice as for me it pays... even if initially it seems to be too harsh or too mellow... but later on the results are just great. Then be it in my personal life or my career. I do not say that the result is always in your favour but it teaches you too much for you to regret it.
Well, talking bout things... there's nothing much going on my side... I am not doing anything, still I dont have time... I am thinking but still nothin useful comes out.... I am muddled up and still I scribble down something.. bout which I myself dont knw much. Life is just taking me for a ride for a past few days.... I dont knw whats the reason... as am smiling but the smile seems to be false... I am laughing but it seems to be hollow and I am writing but it seems to be devoid of any meaning.... Well, well... the story is unending so I dont want to let ti drag n for the time being this is there on my blog.... But I assure u all something nice will be coming up soon.... :D ... Till then bbye.... take care and enjoy ur time :)


I had taken this picture a few days back, when had gone to outing with my friends and had a great time... I was just held by the way these empty boats were floating in the water.... they seem to tell me something but alas I am not able to find the hidden meaning but am njoyin the pic :)

Sunday, March 12, 2006

Varanasi,Benares, Banaras, Benaras, Kashi, and Kasi

A couple of days back... the whole of India shooked under the twin blasts that occured in Sankatmochan Temple at Varanasi. It looked as though again a war is awaiting the Indians, so that they are never able to rest peacefully. The blasts were also of no meagre measure, they were of high intensity and the day was also symbolic. But, the main point behind the whole issue was to create unstability in the country at large and also to challenge the country and its people at the same time.
I myself was shocked at the news of the blasts and it shook me deep within, seeing the place of the blast - A Temple. A place of worship, a place of faith, a place of peace.... What did the people, who did it, gain out of it? Did it serve some useful purpose, did it satisfy their thirst for blood or did it pacify their already overflowing emotions.... nobody knows that, but its sure that they are not humans or rather they cannot be considered as humans. What does a person or persons gain out of killing their fellow beings - it only shows their mentality - a sick mentality. People are being butchered at the place of faith.
And the irony of the whole thing was , the blasts had occured at a place that itself means to give respite from trouble that is, Sankatmochan ( one who relieves you of troubles) and now his own home is in trouble - wah.. what an irony. All this is enough to shake one's faith in the lord and for some people it did also... ( I was also skeptical....) that sometimes even the almighty seems to desert you. But, then an incident occured in my life and it again proved me wrong about the creator. An incident which made my faith in the all powerful stronger than it had been before, and dispelled all my misgivings about him. I faced the worst crisis of my life and came out unsracthed.. literally... Anyways, it was bout me... but there are still hundreds who have their faith shaken and I am sure that the all powerful will make them realise about his existance sooner or later as required.
God Bless All

P.s. The title of my post lists out all the names Varanasi was known as.

Saturday, March 04, 2006

Who's busy these days...

Ha... oh... it looks like everyone is n was busy for a few days.... what to say I too was busy.... but still can't say that I did something useful... It looked as though time was just rushin past the few days, was not able to complete a number of tasks on time and so on. Even now had got some work on hand.. but ab aisa laga ke bahut ho gaya, mujhe ek break chaheye, and what is better than writin a post on the blog.
Past few days in India, a number of important events took place... startin for the presentation of the budget by our finance minister to the arrival n then the departure of the president of US Mr. Bush, to the die hard fans of cricket the ongoing test match between India and England ( where Indian camp is in shambles ) . These were the few events I noticed in the past few days, for rest I wasn,t even aware of whats goin around me. Had a solid workload from my college and the from today we had our mid-sems so will be cutting this sorry state for a couple of days more..... now thats enough of my lamenting....
Coming, back to the recent topics the most important with common mans point of view was the budget, though I was not able to browse through the whole speech, what I gained that he left the tax structure as it was but he increased the service tax to 12%. Now, its like I am not askin for dowry but yes, will take whatever you give to ur daughter like a car n all... What is this Mr. Finance Minister, you make us pay tax in a different sort of way... we are already reelin under a lot of tax pressure n u increased the service tax more, which irrespective of your income, you have to pay to have any service. He also increased the service tax net, well thats okay, but the increase will be pinching... now for u all see it translate into an increase in your mobile bill, your laundry bill, increase in cost of daily good n vegetables ( as they are using transport industry.. :) ) and so on....
The second thing was the excise cuts... here people were very happy that the FinMin has reduced excise for small cars... n immediately the manufacturers dropped the price but on the other hand, he made the OEM accessories more costly and unviable... so now forget, the accessories that your dealer offered yo for free... so more or less you gained nothing. The icing on the cake was the levying of tax on computers... now here the catch, we want to make India an IT superpower and our FinMin helps the cause by raising the enrt barrier ( read costly computers ) thats the irony of India and its people. The man at the centre is fooling round everyone and people are very happy with him... Though some of his efforts are worth applauding but then most of the things done the our Hon. FinMin has left a gaping hole in the wallet of the middle class people of the country....
These were some of the things I got to know bout the budget, while am waitin to study the thing in full but as of now... this was what I felt bout it... so here my opinion..... And about the visit of Mr. Bush... well I'll leave something for next time also ;)
Till then I'll take your leave..... Hope to see u all soon :)

P.S. : well my heading of the post and the content is all irrelevant so try to bear with me, and dont throw curses on me :)

Saturday, February 25, 2006

Goals...

I was just havin a chat with one of my friends and we just hit upon the word GOAL... For each one of us the word has got different meanin but the essence is same for all of us... the ultimate aim or desire... I would stick to " Aim" as the meanin as it sounds good ;)
We all have a goal in mind all the time which we achieve to reach by our efforts... the goal may be a short term or long term it may be a career oriented or social one... but yes they are always there. We sometimes find the path to them as difficult but the apex is always beautiful... Its just like soccer, where u have a goal with the path full of obstacles(opponents) and when u put the football in the goal ( thats ur aim in the match).. u feel the feelin of elation... u see urself on the top of the world at the moment and thats the moment of glory for you. Same is the case of life... we all have the goals set for ourself as I said before and when the crowing moment comes we are on the top of the world...


But then one thing comes to my mind, are material goals the real goal of one's life... I am at sea regarding this point as one should be aware of his ultimate aim in life... does playin in the muddy puddle of money or makin the best of ur life. What does it really matter? Keepin a Maybach or sleepin peacefully every night. Can all the money in the world but the smile for ur family, well thats hard to say. As for some money is everything. Theres no denyin the fact that yes money is always needed but some social or spiritual goal is also needed. As without the food for thought, how can we make sure that we are developin our thinkin process. Without some different sort of goal in life we are completely clueless about where are we headin, what is the inner aim of ourselves... and in the end we realise that its late... we then search for peace which is always within us n never searched for... so make a goal in life that caters to ur spritual as well as mental development apart from the day to day business and see the changes that occur in u as well has how they have impacted ur life.....

"Life as a human is a special gift of god, so dont waste it but give urself some food for thought."

Tuesday, February 21, 2006

Don't Know Y???

For past couple of days, I was not in my senses, meaning... I was just lost. I was not doing anything, just eating and napping. My mind was full of things but I wasn't able to make out them. This was givin way to an uneasiness within me, as when you are not able to have clear thoughts you don't feel you as yourself. I was in utter confusion, it looked as though my brain was givin a error of memory overflow.... and then also I was helpless.
I listened to music which relaxeed me a bit but that was not enough, I made drawings but that also wasn't good... at the end of the day I was just fretting over small things, but as it had to be things were getting worse. Last nite, I did some light reading which relaxed me to a great extent and this made my day better today, while for the final touch I thought that why not write out some post so that my excess of energies (positive or negative) are spent out and I become calm once again. The worst part was that I was not able to give out energies in the usual ways... anger, hitting walls, shouting etc.... It was all jumbled up. But now after writin out something quite haywire here, I am feelin better. I dont knw the real thing.... I don't know anything...I don't knw the surroundings......



I don't know why? Why does it happen? Why does it not go? Why does it makes u sad? Why does it makes you feel bad? Why do u not feel yourself at the time? Why is that it happens anytime? Just Why? Why are there no answers?

Friday, February 17, 2006

Mereko TAG kiya :) ... khush mat ho... hate waala tag hai... :P

" There's nothin to be hated in this world, its all about how you look at things"

Hahahaha... Arti tagged me. Its bout the things that annoy me the most... Well sometimes nothing can annoy me, while sometimes even the slightest thing can annoy me to the hilt. But, if speaking my mind things are not bad... its the way your mind sees them... if not in good spirits anything can annoy you. Like that its all personal perceptions... But now I have to go on with my list of things that I hate or that annoy me the most.... so here are somethings....
  1. I hate those people don't put in efforts for their goals and when they fail, they blame their fate and luck. They don't realise that it ws their fault and not bad luck.
  2. I am annoyed by those who just think that except their own work, everybody is doing some crap of work.
  3. I hate those who are more interested more in what others are doing rather than concentrate on their own work.
  4. I detest those who keep double standards, saying something else and doing something else. Also those of the species who are more interested in back-biting.
  5. I abhor hypocrisy.
  6. I am annoyed by those who think public places are their drawing rooms, and having no consideration for other people. Smoking like an engine, talking like a loud speaker.... and what not.
  7. I really get angered, by those who think the whole world except their home is a garbage dump.
  8. People who are more ready with excuses, than their work annoy me truly.
  9. I abhor those of the kind who think they are the law makers for the society and when it comes to their own lifes.... then its like " laws are made to be broken...."
  10. I am annoyed by those persons who are made to laugh at each and everything, be it grave also. And makin fun of the less fortunate ones, than them.

Last but not the least, all the bad things within me, annoy me to the maximum, as they are cause for my debacle in one way or the other. and by removin them I hope to refine myself.

Chalo... ab major work to ho gaya...likhne ka major work.. but when going thru the post I thought certain changes to be made... but then its the first thought that matter as they show what were ur immediate reactions and whats going on in your sub-concious. Neways, now comes the interesting part.... samajhe nahin kya... arey tag karne ke liye koi ... nahin to phir is tag ka yahan dardnak aant ho jaayega... isiliye... I want to say ki koi mil gaya...to a chalte hain shikar pe... aur yeh hai mere hit list ... :P

well... till now these are the people... but as alwys those who want to follow me can always follow me...

P.S: Kuch baatein rah gaye aur kuch mein zyada he kah diya. Par then its life... :)

Tuesday, February 14, 2006

Sunday, February 12, 2006

Light...


Follow your heart and let god show you the light to lead the way...

Friday, February 10, 2006

I don't know... Why?

"The words are flowing,
without any meaning,
The sounds are deep,
into the heart they seep,
Tears run dry,
then why do I cry,
I think the world is clean,
but truth is its too mean,
Am I too innocent I say,
in answer I receive a nay,
Its all in me and am in all,
this is the earths mall,
I sit and contemplate,
Why do we ever hate,
For all these,I just get a word EGO....
Then why don't we all let it GO.............."

I was just sitting and thinking about life. Today had no definate plans whatsoever.. to update my blog. Just a lil' while ago was talkin to my friend and during it I was thinking bout the human nature. Well I am not anybody to comment on human nature but then I had some points in my mind, so thought to have them here....
Why can't ppl take failure in stride? Why don't they accept it as a means to learn something? Why there is always a hesitation to ask something from a person, who is in some way lesser than you? Why do it is that ppl think that the whole place is against them? Why do ppl remain closed and say that the worlds not friendly? Why do we not be normal with our opponent? Why is it anybody with knowledge is considered as a preacher? Why is it so there is always a big "I" in each and every task? Why??? Why???? Why?????
To all the questions I find it hard to find out the answers... there are things common to them but still each in itself is different. We are all friends but then also we are alone. I am at a loss of thoughts and words... its so simple and yet its complicated. It was a simple path, now turned into a maze...
We all are a family and still I am deserted.... well still contemplating on the issue.

P.S. If this post doesnt make any sense don't mind it.... just written my random thoughts.

Thursday, February 09, 2006

Ek sanam chahiye....

Nahin........... kyon log mujhe tag kar rahe hain..... Well I have been tagged earlier by Doll
and then by Nidhi so I think ab mujhe kuch likhna he padega about my perfect lover :) ... or my soul mate ( sunne mein accha lagta hain na....) Isiliye ek saman chahiye aashiqi ke liye.....
To chaliye hum aur aap.... err.. sirf hum dekhte hain kaisa hoga mera perfect lover :)

Rules of the game are....
1. The tagged victim has to come up with 8 different points of their perfect lover.
2. Need to mention the sex of the target.
3. Tag 8 victims to join this game & leave a comment on their comments saying they have been tagged.
4. If tagged the 2nd time, there is no need to post again.

Sex target : hmmm.... good ques...... arey itna sochna kya ...female he hona chahiye ....

1. Shud b Understanding : She should have great sense of understanding... meanin she should not be of those kind which are " All show but no go".... a person who understands the other person is always a help and they usually make a great pair..

2. Good at heart : She should be good at heart.... as " Seerat sundar hone chahiye... " a person beautiful at heart is liked by everyone....

3. Friendly nature : Should be my friend for life... cheerful in nature and helping to all....and same for me....

4. Optimist : Mere jaise koi optimist hona chahiye... as I prefer positive ppl round me, who look at the sun at horizon as a sunrise not sunset.....life ke liye positve outlook is very necessary in time of crisis.... to manage it....

5. Respect : should respect my family and its values and also should command respect as its a mutual thing...

6. Independent : should have her own identity... and should srtike a balance between profession and family.... same for me....

7. Should be havin a good taste for clothes but yes not be too shopping savvy.

8. Hahahaha.... should not be a villainous type from Ekta Kapoor serials...... and also no senti stuff from the same genre.... sweet n simple is what I like.....

arey yeh kya 8 pts itne jaldi khatam ho gaye.... hmmmmm..... well now will have to search for 8 ppl to tag.... and thats tough as most have been tagged.... so known or unknown b prepared to be tagged.... :)

  1. CyberMenace
  2. Hiren
  3. Megha
  4. Amrit
aur koi nahin mil raha tha... to jise bhi lagi mujhe follow kar sakta hai...
abhi ke liye itna kaafi hai... milte hain ek break ke baad.... :)

Monday, January 30, 2006

Thoughts in random...

Got nothin new to write, so now whatever come to my mind will be down here... I don't know what will the final result but then lifes like that you never know the final outcome.. you can just predict... but then truth is stranger than fiction...
One cannot predict what will happen to him in future... talkin bout future... one cannot say bout the next moment... whatever may happen one should always face it and accept it... as its one's dharma to do his karma and not worry bout the result... :) .. thats what the age old teachin goes from GITA... but do you think it applies in the present world...



Do we work on that principle? Do we really not worry about the outcome of actions we take? Are we really that detached that we continue to work even if we are not gettin any positive outcome? Well, thats to say I study for my exams n don't worry bout the results :D ( hey.. then why am i so tense on the results day???? ......) I work at office n I don't worry bout my appraisals and promotions.... hahahahahhaa....... ( Then Y work day n night.....) Or furhter more I write post on the blog and then wait for ppls to react.... ;) ( well, yes ppls reaction is a result.... ) ..... pata nahin aur bhi kai baar hum log results ke liye he kaam karte hain....
This is the truth thats prevailing much today.... and does it have a sense of fulfillment... sometimes I feel yes there is, while sometimes there isn't. God knows what and where he wants to take us. Does he pulls the strings or have we broken away from him or is it we were never under him? Many questions but no answers.... many myths but no explanations.....
Yes, but am still searchin for the answer..... and the search goes on..........

Tuesday, January 24, 2006

Memories...

"As I sat by the river, looking at the flowing waters...
a ripple made me see, my yesteryears in the mirror...
the age of innocence, the brashness of a young man...
the making of a man, to a frail old man...
The waters said to me " Enjoy as much as you can...
for this is how your story ran..."
I lived my life again, felt the time become still...
And carry these moments to the end, I will... "


The word that makes you feel happy... sad... good... bad... beautiful... ugly... and a great variety of feelings is "memories" ..... memories of your life..... those you have lived in.... those which you are creating.... those which you will be wanting to live again and again. They are a very part of our existance.
Well well... let me tell you , how I got to this word or thing.... actually today my college was closed... so we friends (4 of us) decided to go for a drive and some timepass.... while on the move my friend said that we have just bout 4 months of stayin together and after that we will be parting and goin for jobs etc. This thing make me realised the 4 years we had spent together and all the fun we had. My mind was flooded with all the memories of past years.... the fights we had... the fun ....the teasings.... affairs.... parties and much more. This all made me feel little sad bout leaving my friends but then life is all bout changes and one has to be ready to accept those changes as they come. We all thought bout the our lifes after college... and decided that the time we are left with will be utilized to full and we will make the most of it, so that these pleasant memories will last long.
So, this was the genesis of the topic for me. I sat there thinking over it and realised that yes... someday or the other we have to leave and all that is left with us are the memories, which have accumulated over a period of time. We search into them when we are alone and have no one to comfort us. We look for those sweet moments that still make us laugh... tears make up for the sad ones... they give us the strength as well as weaken us... this is the thing that man wants the most and hates the most... as its a double edged sword...
Well well things have to go this way only.... people get sad when they are parting but then they dont realise that they are only leaving people behind but taking memories with them. You cannot always have your own way... if it was like that, then we would never let our near and dear ones depart from the earth... and yet they depart leavin a whole lot of memories behind them. Yes, it feels sad to leave someone behind but then sometimes its necessary and who says to leave someone behind, we can always be in contact and still be friends, but also we will be making new friends at new place. Memories are those which lie in the heart and they remain there till the end. Its upto a person how he looks at them.....
And I always want to have memories of those pleasant times that I had with my friends, family and everyone throughout my life.... they mean a lot to me.... they form a basis of my existance and they just remind me that I am not alone...

Sunday, January 15, 2006

Expectations...

"I won't talk to him first, he should call me first."
" I won't talk to you, you never tell me anything."

Well these are few of those incidents that we face in our day to day life. We are always expecting one thing or other from someone around us. When we have a tiff with our friend, we always expect him to break the ice. We are always expecting a thing or other at every moment... but then we fail to realise that... havin expectations are ok, but when they are not fulfilled, we should have the heart to accept it. But, that does not happen always. We are hurt in some way or the other due to the incident and remember it over period of time as basically, that breakin of our expectation has hurt our ego and when ego is hurt... the scars remain....



From, the time we are born, expectations are born with us as is our ego... we expect our mother to know that we are hungry and feed us.... if not we cry like hell and then only after some persuation do we quiten. When, we grow older, we expect our parents to fulfill our demands , then be it rational or not... remember the day when your father forgot to bring the toy, u were expecting, n how you felt... your heart ached, you refused to have food that day... and your parents were troubled with your behaviour.... But for u the toy was more important not your parents n their troubles at that time. It was like that, How could they forget my toy.....
When we are in our youth... expectations grow by leaps n bounds... we are constantly expecting a thing from someone or other.... from parents, from friends , from teachers etc... but, we forget that the more we expect, the more trouble we are creating for ourselves.... as unfulfilled expectations are not easy at heart... they make us sour, for the time being, we lose control of ourselves.... n thats the worst a man can have for himself as when you dont practice self control, your actions belie you n those moments have great influence on your surroundings...
All said true,.. but its hard not to have expectations, as if one achieves that feat he is as good as one who has renounced the world... So, I dont say to forgo all your expectations, but yes, somethings can be done bout it.... we can always make ourselves ready for any situation, for any critical moment..... But one foremost thing that, we should always try to limit our expectations... and also when we are expecting something from someone, it should be within rational limits, worldly matters should be kept in mind and so on....
There are many things in this context, which I am still exploring, but have realised one thing truly, that the less the expectations the more happy you r, as surpirses always make you happy.... in other words, the unexpected is more pleasant n joyous that expected ones.... just remember the times when there were good surprises for u, an unexpected b'day party or an unexpected gift.... and how happy you were at that moment..... as if you would do anything to live that day again...... yes, thats the power of the unexpected........
So, just be calm, be cool, n live the life in a noble fashion........ set benchmarks for your ownself and try to match them.... leave the world aside.......... just try not to expect from them, but try to keep your expectations to yourself....... n always try to fulfill them n njoy the essence of success...... God will be always there with you!!!!!!!!

Wednesday, January 11, 2006

Laugh.... laugh.....laugh............

"Laugh n the world laughs with you.........
Cry n you cry alone............"

Its an age old word of wisdom, that when u are happy the whole world seems to be beautiful to you, while when u r depressed the world becomes drab, with all the colors missing from it. Its all the perception of your mind... its how u would like to see the surroundings n you see it in that way. You r totally oblivion to the feeling of others around you, the beautiful sounds of life does not find the way to your heart... they just get stuck up in the way n get lost in your body..... We just try to alienate ourselves from the reality or I may say that "circumstances"... b'coz its only the escapist who get frustrated and don't want to look into the face of life and accept the challenge... they r the ones who just say that life is difficult or its tough to survive in this big, bad world...... but then to their own knowledge there are others who r surviving n leading a happy life... its just the perception that needs to be changed.
We all like a person who is smiling n happy all the time... he's the person who's sought by people for comfort, they like to share their problems with him as they know that, he can provide a solution to the problem. The world always looks upto the one who is ready to face any kind of situation and that too with a smiling face. The reality hits hard but when you take it into your srtide it hurts you less, than when you try to deny it. The more willingly you accpet the facts and ponder on them for a possible solution, the more clear headed you will be. Life throws many challenges to you and then sees to it that how you face them. You can only help other, when you yourself are having an uncluttered mind. An open mind is always ready to welcome than a closed mind as in the closed mind, there is always paucity of space... while in an open mind there is always abundance of space....
Laughing and crying are both the part of the life, its only upto you, which of these two - you want more of- a good laugh or a bitter weep. Change the perception towards life and see it changes its way towards you....... if you spread laughs, it will give you laughs and if you spread bitterness, it will give bitterness to you.... It only reflects whatever your actions are... and same is with the world. You get back what you give to the world. So, if you spread laughter.... your life will be filled with laughter...... so, its always better to spread smiles...... grins....... giggles.......... n a wholehearted laugh.... and then see the whole universe returns it to you......

Sunday, January 08, 2006

Timepass..... ;)

Today, I had my XAT paper as usual.... kuch nahin bana paper mein :) aur mujhe to neend bhi bahut aa rahi the.. to I was just thinkin ke kab paper khatam ho aur mein ghar par aake so jaaun...khair no probs... Any how the paper went by... n the ordeal was over. Now was very happy another paper went by.... as yesterday was just thinkin that for whole round the year the only work that I do regularly is to give exams.... apart from daily chores ;) Each n every month ther is some sort of exams... some regular college some competitive etc... only thing is that ke now exams don't make me tense. They just come n go by just like a bad dream.... but one that haunts you for a good number of years n that too on a regular basis....
Well, speakin bout other things... today I was not in a state to write something of my usual stuff... my mind is on a holiday for a couple of days... so its me in the orignal form n scribbling all over :D ... Its just like blabbering unlimited hehehehehe..... but then its ok.... Life's like that only... the more we make ourselves njoy it the more it seems to b beautiful... the more we worry bout it the more it gives us reasons to b tense... so, I usually spend a day or two without my mind... whenever it starts to overflow with all crap bout the world.... it empties itself in a day or two... relexes a bit n is again ready for duty in this ol' model.... so no worry, no tension, just timepass thats goin on in my life...... n till its time for a next write-up.... a very big hug( jaadu ki jhappi) n au revoir............

Wednesday, January 04, 2006

Out of my mind

Hi, friends wishing you all a Very Happy and a Prosperous New Year...... I know that I am somewhat late in wishin, but as it is good wishes are always welcome :)

2005 has been a year full of happenings... for me it holds both pleasent and pinching memories... but then life's like that... nobody can dictate it, its always bout trying trying n trying... sometimes you suceed n sometimes not..... nyways, on the last day of 2005 I was reading a book titled " Out of My Mind " ( from here comes my post's title..) by - Richard Bach.
It was certainely a wonderful book... a book that makes you see youself in a different perspective... a feeling of surprise sweeps over you, when the things said by the author start making sense... Its all bout the 'Mind' ... yes, the most powerful tool god has bestowed upon us.
All that goes around us makes an impression on our minds..... in a better way - in each and every action we do, our mind is involved... All things generate out of our mind, it has got tremendous amount of power... its upto you, how you utilise the potential of your mind... Thats why, all those who practice meditation are usually fresh n feel always cheerful, as their mind is fresh due to meditation which brings bout an air of calmness with it...
We always look with awe to those who have been able to control their mind... we all try to control our mind on similar lines but in vain as it requires practice, just like " Rome was not built in a day". What we do, we think, we dream - all has got link to our mind... it only determines our success or failure, how well we are able to control it the more it reflects on ourselves... A calm and cool mind is the solution to all problems... while an agitated mind makes way for more trouble...
Thus, to make most of ur mind, one should be able to control his mind and the one who controls his mind conquers the world.