Pain of success...

The heart is shattered once again,
Inside me it brings a lot of pain.
Words are missing to express my feeling,
Under heavy pressure is my soul reeling.
Life again became a place devoid of heart,
It has cut my soul into many part,
Victories are to be celebrated in fashion,
For me am all alone on all occassions,
Don't know what to say or speak,
Through my eyes do dry tears leak.
Havnt got the courage to ask for more,
My lifes a bag full of pores.
Its a way that I do stand tall in the face of soul,
I am all alone, even though have reachd my goal.
Its a battle of emotions as you want a celebration,
But for everyone its just a common occasion.
The eyes strain for tears to flow,
But they refuse to come, however slow.
Its not as though am devoid of pain,
Its just like dancing in rain full of pain.
I am happy , I like to dance in rain,
Its my tears that flow, but am not in pain.
I am standing tall, standing proud,
I am as always alone in the crowd...

Life is not what it looks like...

Sitting in the hot noon sun,
I was thinking about none,
Trying to gather pieces of time,
When life was like sweet lime,
A bit of sugary, a bit of salty,
But now its noe, its just faulty.
I scramble over the memories,
Of the numerous journeys,
Still there's a void within me,
I am empty to thee,
Running about in the life's walk,
I dont have anyone to talk,
Things may be sweet and beautiful,
But the tastes are bland and tearful,
Saying a lot is still not lot,
In the life's web I am caught,
Trying to break free from the prison,
I want to be like the rising sun,
I am searhing for the only one,
I am searching one from one...

Jeevan...

Bas baitha hun likhne ke liye,
Har shad mein hai gahrayi,
Ek nazar daal ke dekho inme,
Milon faile hui hai tanhai.

Jeevan ke yeh reet hai aisi,
Samajh na paye sab koi,
Samajh samajh ke jo samjhe,
Hari ko samjhe wohi.

Jo hai likha woh nahin hun main,
Jo na likha wahi hai mera roop,
Likhne waale ko tum samjho,
Likhta hai jaise chanuon aur dhoop.

Tanhai hai tere saathi,
Na hai koi ab aur bhi tera,
Raat bhar kyon rota hai tu,
Shayad ek din hoga savera.

Kya maine socha tha,
Kya maine hai paya,
Yeh jeevan toh bas moh hai,
Aur har vastu hai maya.

Aaj soch raha hai har antarmann,
Kya hai mera satya,
Tanhai hai ab mera saaya,
Mrityu ko har jeev ne paya.

Har aane wala ek din toh jata hai,
Phir mera mann kyon ghabrata hai,
Aaj toh phir uday hua hai mera,

Abse har din hai naya savera.

Am I happy...

Am I happy or its just a facade,
Am I sad or its just my heart.
Feelings abound still without sound,
Heart in pain but still game.
I fail to feel the feeling intended,
Feelings in heart have all ended.
In some scattered pieces is life mine,
Not like ambosia, but like brine.
Am I happy or just I try to be,
I don't know but I want to be 'Me',
Lost here lost there,
Am lost everywhere,
Happiness is what I am searching for,
Will try to find it for sure...

Life as soul...

Searching for the soul,
I came across the world,
What was mine was never mine,
For what I fought never survived.
I am going into the dark realms of nature,
Being a person I never thougth would become,
The world seemed to be in a mess,
As was my life at the time.
I tried to run, but time was faster than me,
It was my folly to think I was the destiny,
The truth was bitterest to the last bite,
It was my soul that was mine, Not my life...

Life's a mystery...

Quite a few times I would say,
" Life's a mystery"
I say I know the start,
But ending is always a mystery.
When I walk, am sure of my feet,
But the roads are always a mystery.
When I speak, I am sweet,
But the interpretation, is always a mystery.
All the while I am the lucky one,
But who is chosen is always a mystery.
For people the worlds' a beauiful place,
But for me its always a mystery,
I say and do, what I think,
But how I think is always a mystery,
My life is mine all the time,
But after me, my "Life's a mystery",
I may recede into history,
But always my "Life will remain a mystery"

Question...

Why is life only about wants?
Why are eyes only for light?
Why I end just on I and Me?
Why do I lie, even in front of thee?

So many questions, still very few answers,
Whenever I sit to think, they give me shivers,
Are they running from me,
Or is it me, who's running from them.
Always am looking for the one answer,
Who am I? Do I live forever???

Lost in the crowd...

When I look around,
There are lots of sound.
When inside I peek,
Whom do I seek.

All the rights and all the wrongs,
From the sad to sweet songs.
All the way life's a mystery,
One day I will become history.

I may be standing big and tall,
Yet in reality I am very small.
I may be sporting a happy face,
Inside its lined with sadness lace.

With the trace of glint in the eyes,
I stand tall telling lies.
A single tear when runs on the cheek,
I sound timid, lost and meek.

All the while I pose a strong exterior,
When I am crumbling in the interior.
I am well supported all the time,
I look for those who are mine.

I have loads of people around me,
Still I am alone without thee.
Don't know when the loneliness will end,
I have lots of actions to amend.

All said but little done,
I am not there, am no one.
All the while I am the person,
All the time I am none.

Lost within me, lost from outside,
Oh! lord please help me,
I am lost, I am lost,
I am lost inside as well as in crowd...

Silence thats silent...

Is the silence within,
Or is it outside,
Lots of voices around,
But still its very quiet.
A war thats tearing me apart,
Of it Am I a part or not.
As with the nature do I blend,
Or its just the silence that says.
Lots of words spoken,
Least understood in nature,
War is within me or nature,
Or its just the silence.
Am I afraid of myself?
Even though I dont know myself,
So, whats making it worse to live,
My own self or the silence.
I fail to understand the implicit,
Yet silence cannot make it loud,
Its in the nature of nature,
Do I change for worse or better.
The silence is hard to answer,
Answers that are well spoken of,
But answers that cannot be answered.
Its the silence that wants the answer,
Its the silence thats the answer.
I dont know who Am I?
Its the silence within me that speaks,
Such is the meaning of silence,
It makes me speak its tounge,
The language of silence.
I speak, speak my heart out,
Its only the silence that I say,
Rest is understood by you...

Confused...

Bahut kuch ho gaya hai,
bahut kuch hone ko hai,
jaane kya kho gaya hai,
jaane kya khone ko hai.

Life has got nothing special in tow,
Its going on in a silent row.
Am trying to shore it up,
Dont know where Am gonna land.