Sunday, January 15, 2006

Expectations...

"I won't talk to him first, he should call me first."
" I won't talk to you, you never tell me anything."

Well these are few of those incidents that we face in our day to day life. We are always expecting one thing or other from someone around us. When we have a tiff with our friend, we always expect him to break the ice. We are always expecting a thing or other at every moment... but then we fail to realise that... havin expectations are ok, but when they are not fulfilled, we should have the heart to accept it. But, that does not happen always. We are hurt in some way or the other due to the incident and remember it over period of time as basically, that breakin of our expectation has hurt our ego and when ego is hurt... the scars remain....



From, the time we are born, expectations are born with us as is our ego... we expect our mother to know that we are hungry and feed us.... if not we cry like hell and then only after some persuation do we quiten. When, we grow older, we expect our parents to fulfill our demands , then be it rational or not... remember the day when your father forgot to bring the toy, u were expecting, n how you felt... your heart ached, you refused to have food that day... and your parents were troubled with your behaviour.... But for u the toy was more important not your parents n their troubles at that time. It was like that, How could they forget my toy.....
When we are in our youth... expectations grow by leaps n bounds... we are constantly expecting a thing from someone or other.... from parents, from friends , from teachers etc... but, we forget that the more we expect, the more trouble we are creating for ourselves.... as unfulfilled expectations are not easy at heart... they make us sour, for the time being, we lose control of ourselves.... n thats the worst a man can have for himself as when you dont practice self control, your actions belie you n those moments have great influence on your surroundings...
All said true,.. but its hard not to have expectations, as if one achieves that feat he is as good as one who has renounced the world... So, I dont say to forgo all your expectations, but yes, somethings can be done bout it.... we can always make ourselves ready for any situation, for any critical moment..... But one foremost thing that, we should always try to limit our expectations... and also when we are expecting something from someone, it should be within rational limits, worldly matters should be kept in mind and so on....
There are many things in this context, which I am still exploring, but have realised one thing truly, that the less the expectations the more happy you r, as surpirses always make you happy.... in other words, the unexpected is more pleasant n joyous that expected ones.... just remember the times when there were good surprises for u, an unexpected b'day party or an unexpected gift.... and how happy you were at that moment..... as if you would do anything to live that day again...... yes, thats the power of the unexpected........
So, just be calm, be cool, n live the life in a noble fashion........ set benchmarks for your ownself and try to match them.... leave the world aside.......... just try not to expect from them, but try to keep your expectations to yourself....... n always try to fulfill them n njoy the essence of success...... God will be always there with you!!!!!!!!

14 comments:

Fursat said...

expectations..or may be some way of feeling low or hurt..

This is just impossible not to expect. we expect from everyone..be it family..be it frds...be it God!!!

We get hurt, we cry but still we expect that someone would come to wipe off our tears.

nobody cant help it..

but its true..no expectations no sorrows..

so i expect you to not to expect so much...just be the way you are...and smile..

take care

God bless u !

doll said...

expectations.. they are part n parcel of our being.. like the dirt on a white shirt, no matter how hard u wash it, the shirt will never again be white as a new one.. :) okay poor analogy but i guess u get my point.. btw why do u have 2 comment options?nd which one to actually use?

Arti said...

Hi Manish! You talk like my best friend Anita. She is the person who taught me that expectations are like double-edged sword, causing more damage than good.
Since then I have learnt to reduce my expectations and it sure has helped. Human nature is such that he cannot give up expecting altogether. But, trying always helps.

So! After this comment I am not going to expect you to reply but I will visit ur blog again and see if you have replied :lol:


Arti

Manish said...

@Neetie
its true that its hard not to have expectations.... but, then i only say that we can try to lessen our expectations and this will make life lots easier..
take care
GBU

@Doll
ur point is right but then its like that as the more we get the more we desire... so if we get something expected .. our expectations increases by leaps and bounds... so its always better to control them..
N btw two comment boxes are just like that.... had got the xtra one early on so lettin it remain there...
tc n GBU

@Arti
hi arti,its true that the basic human nature is full of desires n expectations... but then its the root cause of all sufferings... the moment these decrease, our happiness increases... n its good that u realised that... so even if u hadn't expected... this is the reply to ur comment :D
tc n GBU

Neetika said...

Never expect anything from anyone!!
Because when expectations does not fulfilles
it hurts a lot.........

doll said...

if i convert what u've said to my previous poor analogy.. it turns out to be - "if a shirt is dirty, it itself gets more dirty.. we dont wanto wash it now cos we have started liking a dirty shirt.." whatever.. :LOL:

Manish said...

@Doll
well... it was something like that, as if a shirt is dirty, we dont wash it as we think that it will again become dirty n in the process we just lose the orignal color of the shirt as it only gets more dirty over a period of time.... so just not wait in anticipation of it to get to the height of dirtyness n wash it before it loses its color.. lolz .. :D

Manish said...

@neetika
yup... its true... n it always leaves a scar for a long time... so, be generous n don't expect nething in return...
take care
God bless u

emotions said...

hey , its true dat ven expectations r not fulfilled its hurts a lot....but u knw wat! v humans hv such a mentality dat v can never live widout expecting anything frm anybody.....

v r all ready to suffer d pain evrytime v vud hv ven r expectations vud not b fulfilled bt not at all ready to stop expecting thngs frm other people.....

probably , it has bcome d part of r lives....or it d way v love 2 live.....

anyways!! good thought given...

all d bst!!

keep writing n keep smiling:))

Manish said...

@emotions
hey a good way to put up the things.. well its just how u look at it... its ur own perception that matters..
tc n god bless u

J said...

and each of you think, "why has all the ice isolated upon me"

Anonymous said...

how can u forget .. " saale dogie tuu usse canteen le gaya tha mujhe nai .. tera pet kharab ho jayega" hehehe :p

nyways yeah man very true ... but expectations,hopes,desires sometimes i dont feel any diff in any of em ... bottom line they all suck :p nice post keep posting :))

doll said...

u've been tagged.. vist mah blog for more :)

Manish said...

@Doll
hey doll,
won't be replyin to ur tag... will do it sometime later for some other tag...
TC