Happiness...

" Happiness is not an absolute quantity, but a relative one...
from person to person, the definition of happiness differs...
but yes, one feeling is common...
you feel happy when you spread happiness..."

When, I was 4yrs of age I got my first bike... that day i felt very happy.... it lasted for few months. When, I was 6yrs of age I got my first remote controlled toy.... again I felt very happy... it lasted for about a month. When, I was older still I got my first computer.... this time my happiness lasted for a few weeks. Later, when I got my first scooter... the joy lasted for about a couple of weeks.The joy of a new mobile lasted for a week...
Slowly, very silently, my feeling of happiness was decreasing day by day..... but I was not aware of the fact... I became used to this type of feeling....... getting hold of a thing for a moment feeling good and at the next instant forgetting it...
It was that the real feeling was missing and deep down the heart I knew this... I had to feel the feeling... ( confused...) basically I was not gettin the feeling of being happy... its an internal feeling that u get to feel when you are really feelin good..... Of all the incidents I mentioned above its very difficult to feel good even for one of them when I remember them today.... yes, but at those times I was elated....
These materialistic pleasure now seem to be just to something that was keepin me away from the real joy of the life... I was just like a leaf in the storm who follows the winds but is not trying to change its direction... just getting blown in the world without any resistance... I then resisted and thought over the matter... that what made me feel happy and realised that while making others happy kept me happy and I could still feel it fresh all through my life...... its like making people smile... making the world feel the essence of life.... making the things come alive.... yes these are all different forms of happiness... but I feel them inherintly, I never had to say myself its there... b'coz it makes me feel it....
I never felt so happy when I made my family feel happy..... made my friend feel good.... made the neighbours getting the feel of joy... making a stranger "smile"..... because I never expected anything in return and just wanted to make the world a better place to live in.... yup materialistic things make you happy but thats short lived, the real happiness is one that you can still feel over the time..... N so I just ask one question

"When was the last time you experienced real happiness......"

And in the answer lies the truth of life...... that life's too short to be sad, so why not be happy.....

Footprints in sand....

Today, I had my exam and I messed it up..... I was feelin too low after that and was just tryin to find out reasons why I failed to do well ( basically, i was not searchin for reasons... but blamin the circumstances and people, for the debacle, so that I would feel good!!!).... but things seemed to turn to worse....instead of feelin better I was feelin more and more troubled at heart...... Ah! then I got the thing the best way to dispel the feelings..... complain to god.... just tell him it was not done... he's not being fair to me... he's made the world bad... blah...blah....blah.... Wah! Wah! I was feeling relaxed...... how nice...... ah ha! feelin great......n then the hell broke lose - a huge wave of guilty feelin swept upon my earlier feelins...... :((
I just asked myself that Why? Why am I blamin god? After all it was not his fault.... it was my fault... n then came to me the line of the poem that I had liked since childhood.... and which had gives me courage and strength each time I read it....... Its a very well known poem... read by all but understood by a few.... if everbody understands it they would see a change in their lives....
As its my favourite poem, I am quotin it here :

"Footprints in the Sand"

One night I dreamed I was walking along the beach with the Lord.
Many scenes from my life flashed across the sky.
In each scene I noticed footprints in the sand.
Sometimes there were two sets of footprints,
other times there were one set of footprints.

This bothered me because I noticed
that during the low periods of my life,
when I was suffering from
anguish, sorrow or defeat,
I could see only one set of footprints.

So I said to the Lord,
“You promised me Lord,
that if I followed you,
you would walk with me always.
But I have noticed that during the most trying periods of my life
there have only been one set of footprints in the sand.
Why, when I needed you most, you have not been there for me?”

The Lord replied,
“The times when you have seen only one set of footprints in the sand,
is when I carried you.”

By:Mary Stevenson

Failure....

"SUNRISE or SUNSET : its in the eyes of the beholder"

Tears were rolling unabated... the sky looked hazy... the sun was setting... in horizon or in his LIFE!!! Sometimes, he looked at the letter and sometimes towards the sky, as though questioning god... " Was this done or was it another beginning ?"
The letter just said " you failed..." but to him it looked like a wave washing away the castle built in sand... and the whole crowd around was sneering at him.... He had worked so hard for two whole years to pusue his goal, only to find that it still was much farther.... as the letter said you failed...

Failure is one thing we all (most of us) are afraid of... we never want to face failure in life, then be it any field... personal or professional... spirtitual or material..... But what we don't realize that failure is a part of the game... there is no fire without smoke.... no heads without tails.... no success without failure... If achieving success was that easy, then nobody would have ever failed... but yet people fail.... And they fail again and again. But only some succeed... WHY? beacuse they learn from their failures... one who introspects himself and sees to Why? Where? When? did I go wrong... was I lacking in commitment or lost the track of my goal? was I striving that hard or was it all show no go? What was it. And the answer comes from within...
Failure is just one of the way in which god tries to teach us lessons of life... he wants that we all should always live life and that too a life with meaning.... n whenever we become complacent he just pulls a string here and one there and we are again there from where we started... for he thinks that we need to learn some more lessons....
So, always take failure in your stride and analyse what all did go wrong... and I assure you for sure that the answer will come from within... don't blame the world just ask god... and he's always there to help you. So, don't get disheartened and don't crib.... start anew and victory will be yours...........

Feelings...

Yesterday, I was havin a chat with one of my friends... while chattin we just came upon the point of hurting someone - one who is near n dear one. We both gave our point of views and the talk continued. Later on, as I sat thinkin about that topic, it looked as though it had some underlyin meanin. I just asked myself... How would I feel if someone closed to me hurt my feelings or he betrays me? it was tough to answer that question. Why? because when something happens to oneself we come to know that, how much that action hurts. We usually never want to face the reality. But, yes, once in our life time a situation will come when we will have to face the music and then the truth will dawn upon us. Usually, it happens with all of us that when we are in a agitated state of mind, sometimes we speak or do things, which accordin to us are right but we don't take into consideration, how would they impact our family or friends. And, these moments, however small they are, could impart a scar on the relationship for a lifetime. Nobody's perfect but still we all can try to be good human beings... even if we can't praise somethin we should refrain from criticising. So, be happy n spread happiness!

There are few lines, I got from somewhere, which I liked n I'm quotin -

"What HURTS u the most?
Being hurt by someone, you 'TRUST' a lot,
Or being trusted by someone, you've 'HURT' a lot,
Just Think!!!!"

Peace

My, exams are round the corner i.e from day after tomorrow and I am really not serious about them till date. I am unable to understand why am I not serious, even though these are my 7th sem exams and the marks of these exams have a significant presence in my degree........ :((
Kya bolo main, life to jaise lagta hai ruk si gaye hai mere liye........... it all looks dark and scary to me.... I am not really able to decipher what life wants from me - at this moment......... what has it in store for me........ but sometimes all the optimism fades and it look dark .... dark......... dark................
And I don't want darkness......... all I want is light..... a divine light that will help me wade through the dirty waters........ I want that all powerful, who is the source of all energy to guide me, make me understand the nuances of life.... help me understand the world better....I want him to talk to me.....
As to me the world dosen't seem to be natural anymore without his guidance.... it looks more of an animated affair...... the occurrence of this thought ony pricks me to the depth of my soul........ my heart bleeds as to why? why? why? am I not able to understand this place that I live in....... my soul gives out piercing cries but nobody hears them........ eyes are burning with tears in them..... but I am alone............ all alone in this place............ on this land.......... nobody is mine and I am nobody's....... all the bonds seem to be falsified and only one truth seems to prevail, in which's search I am in........... the ultimate reality......... the ultimate truth.............. the essence of life........
yes........ I want to discover the truth and fuse myself into it........... so that I may find, atlast the thing we all want - PEACE!!!!!!!!!

Life and me

As, I say, take life at its face value, its too easy to say but hard to practice. It looks quite simple to make such a statement, but it rather concerns with unravelling the mysteries of - Life. I always try to introspect myself and try to discover more of me. Its seems to be a very boring task at first, but as I go on exploring further, I start enjoying. I enjoy more and more, with time and eventually I realize that externally also the world seems beautiful to me. I have started appreciating the things near me and feel a sense of calmness round me. Everytime, I discover something new, I think over it and see if it is doing me good or causing me harm. These, things may sound trivial but are very important. Atleast, they made me change my outlook towards my life and life of those around me. I realized, that until and unless I know myself, how can I proclaim to know others. And, the irony being that sometimes, even my whole life is too short to know myself, as I usually choose the wrong path. We always, want the people near us to change, be it our parents, friends, spouse or relatives. But, have we ever tried to change ourselves - hardly ever. Why? because its easy for us to complain and get away, but difficult to find the right cure. My mind is not ready to accept that yes, I can be at fault, but its always the other way round. And in the whole process we keep loosing ourselves and finally a stage comes that we are afraid of our own selves. As it seems to be a complete stranger.Why, I say all this is because I have experienced a part of it. Earlier, I used to be such a person myself- complaining and complaining. But, then one incident changed whole of my life, that is, it shook me deep within. Then, for the first time I realised that I was loosing a track of myself, I am loosing me in the crowd, I started to fear some part of me. It was at that time that I took the decision and with a brave face - faced my life. To my utter disbelief, it was not that bad, yes I was made to own my mistakes, which was hard but it always taught me something or the other, which helped me later on to cope up with my external world. Like this i befriended my life and now we are the best pals.

New Life

This is my first blog. Previously, I had never been intrested in blogging, but seeing my friends doing it I wanted to give it a try, so I am here. Its just like entering something new, or say a new life. The life of cyberworld..... full of own virtual selfs rather a way to put up your thoughts to a whole new set of people. Those are like you, all lost into this virtuality. But, all more than alive.... it seems contradictory but then its true. We all search our lives for something meaningful or we can say truth, but when it comes to light we are not ready to accept it. Acceptance is the key to all things, accept things at face value and you find things going the easy way for you.