Time goes on...

I looked back on time, when thy said it was mine.
I took all the sacks, so that into them " time" I could pack.
I tried n tried, but all in vain. The end result was still the same.
I just let more of it slip away then the amount I could catch.
And then it dawned upon me, I was catching that could not be caught.
The time bygone was never mine, the time to come is not mine,
its the present time that is mine and am wasting it all the time.
I again looked back and the time was smiling and then I realized,
it was something that I could never catch but yes I can live upto full,
the time I have with me, the time I can live within.

I came to write something today and thought writin bout the current affairs, but the above lines flowed even before on the screen I did stare. This was something totally unexpected as nothing was in my concious mind but yup, nobody can vouch for the subconcious.
Today, I had my 3rd paper and now only one is left. Yesterday night, when I laid on my bed and was letting my thoughts flow. I suddenly realised that I was thinking about my past few years : how they had been? how I had fared all these years and all. It was nothing specific to start with but later on something stirred my mind. Past few months for me had both happy and sad memories. But I chose to remember the happy ones :) . I made a lot of friends and god was really gracious to have bestowed to me some very good friends. My time spent with them though was small but it was really of high quality. All these things made me happy.
But now as I sat writing, somethings pinching me. Its all about to change, the times, the surroundings and all. As they say " Nothing is permanent except change" , I was just thinking is it necessary for everything, yes, everything to change. Then, it suddenly dawned upon me : Was I holding things too tight? Was I trying to hold time in my hand? Was I just like any other person, not wanting to accept the truth? Or am I sensitive or insensitive?
Don't know what to say, but this question of being sensitive and insensitive really bugged me. It really one important question to which's answer am desperately trying to find out. Does being practical means you are insensitive ? Or I may put it in a some better words - Does taking the reality into your stride means you are insensitive or you dont care for people? Am really at loss for this thing. I know that now the time is not far when I will have to forgo my home, when I will be joining my job. And when I would leave this city, I would also leave many things behind. But, it does not mean that I will leave my old relations behind. They were there,they are there, they will be there and will remain for eons. But, for some its an end to relations and all. You could not have each and everything you want, for gaining something, somethings have to be forgone. So, its upto you what do you want and what choice you make and then you continue on that path.
Its again the same old story with me, trying to tell something else and something other has come out. But, then this topic was also looming in mind mind for sometime back, so it came out here. Its a few days left for me to leave this place and start afresh, but then I want to live my life in present and while trying to do so, I don't try to hurt anyone, but still if I have done that in the process am sorry for it.
So, there goes my thoughts.... and lets see when something new crops up here.... till then...
bbye
take care

Yours
Manish

Exams are on...

It has been quite a few days that I have not visited this place... was sort of busy... ( well had to say that... ). Anyways, my exams are going on so was gettin lil time for bloggin. Actually, was not in the mood to write something new... but now its ok. Today, had my first paper and now its 3 more to go... then comes the part everybody is waiting for or not rather... the day when the exams are over and its party time and then the parting time....
Well well, let those things remain the way they are. Today was my first paper for final semester and now at the moment very happy. Well its like 1 down and 3 more to go at todays date. Chalo yaar no more of this crappy stuff of me 'n' my studies... there are much better things in life to think n write about ;) .
Life is full of different colors... its upto us what color we want to see. Its like whenever there is light we have a dark shadow... but that shadow has also got some qualities, its upto u what u see the darkness or the teachin that... when in the light of glory everybody is with you.... but in the darness of oblivion you are all alone... so try to find real gems... n dont b too busy collecting stones when you realise suddenly that you have lost a diamond. A true friend is worth a million dollors so dont lose that friend.
I dont knw what am i scribbling at this moment but still I had let it remain there. I dont knw how everyone faces life.. as to every other person his life is at the worst period while all the persons by his side are enjoying their life to max. Its not like that, each and everyone of us has got our own special problems but the tough ones dont always blame the circumstances and cry over the problem, they work on the problem ... solve it and come out victorious of the situation. Some say that its easy to preach but hard to follow... but sometimes the preachings come from our own experiences.... neways too much of this stuff..... now am goin to stop....
If u ppl out there think this whole post is absurd dont blame me as my exams are going on... so here on this page comes the after effects of my not studtyin for the exams... oops! did I write not studyin... neways now its written let it be.... Chalo then... i'll take ur leave...
BBye
Take care

And Wish me luck for Exams.....
Yours
Manish