Am I happy...

Am I happy or its just a facade,
Am I sad or its just my heart.
Feelings abound still without sound,
Heart in pain but still game.
I fail to feel the feeling intended,
Feelings in heart have all ended.
In some scattered pieces is life mine,
Not like ambosia, but like brine.
Am I happy or just I try to be,
I don't know but I want to be 'Me',
Lost here lost there,
Am lost everywhere,
Happiness is what I am searching for,
Will try to find it for sure...